Degrees Fahrenheit Defined:

* 60: California residents put on sweaters (if they can find one).
* 50: Miami residents turn on the heat.
* 45: Vermont residents go to outdoor concerts.
* 40: You can see your breath.
         California residents shiver uncontrollably.
         Minnesota residents go swimming.
* 35: Italian cars don't start.
* 32: Water freezes.
* 30: You plan your vacation to Australia.
* 25: Ohio water freezes.
         California residents weep pitiably.
         Minnesota residents eat ice cream.
         Canadians go swimming.
* 20: Politicians begin to talk about the homeless.
         New York City water freezes.
         Miami residents plan vacation further south.
* 15: French cars don't start.
         Cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you.
* 10: You need jumper cables to get the car going.
* 5: American cars don't start.
* 0: Alaska residents put on T- shirts.
* - 10: German cars don't start.
           Eyes freeze shut when you blink.
* - 15: You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo.
           Arkansas residents stick tongue on metal objects.
           Miami residents cease to exist.
* - 20: Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with you.
           Politicians actually do something about the homeless.
           Minnesota residents shovel snow off roof.
           Japanese cars don't start.
* - 25: Too cold to think.
           You need jumper cables to get the driver going.
* - 30: You plan a two-week hot bath.
            Swedish cars don't start.
* - 40: California residents disappear.
            Minnesota residents button top button.
            Canadians put on sweaters.
            Your car helps you plan your trip south.
* - 50: Congressional hot air freezes.
           Alaska residents close the bathroom window.


* - 80: Hell freezes over.
           Polar bears move south.
          Green Bay Packer fans order hot cocoa at the game.

Hit Counter